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ב"ה

My light

Tuesday, 14 September, 2021 - 9:01 pm

 

Between Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur, I am generally busy preparing for Yom Kippur and Sukkos. Which sermon to say when? How many people can we fit in the sukkah for dinner? Should we do another program?

Over the past year I heard many times, Kushi I don't know how you do it all. I’ll admit, it feels good to be appreciated. It feeds the ego to know you are doing more than many others. It's great for fundraising to be able to say your dollar goes further with Chabad. It also feels great to actually do more and be active.

This year, it's relatively quiet now. I am wondering why Hashem gave me Covid now? What does Hashem want from me? What is Yom Kippur supposed to look like at home? Away from our community, from shul?

I do not know what He wants from me. I think I might need to find meaning in the quiet, in the need for a break, in the ability to say I can't. To surrender. To focus more on prayer and my connection to Hashem.

• I can't do it all. I am not even supposed to.
• Fraida and I don't need to always do another program, just because it's a good idea.
• I need to learn to trust you, our community, more. That you will observe what you can, and you'll reach out if we can help.
• I must learn to focus inward, on praying when I pray, not doing other things “simultaneously”.

It is written in the Hayom Yom:
We are "day workers." Talmud Eruvin 65a. 
What does this mean? Day means light. 
Our work is to illuminate and enlighten the world with the light of the Torah. 
Besides the necessity of being what we ought to be, our whole service of G-d is to be privileged to develop students. Students who are devoted with heart and mind to the inner intention or purpose of our existence. 
Our disciples must know that it is not sufficient to study the Revealed Torah and to cherish the Sacred by observing mitzvot; there must also be avoda sheb'leiv, the service of the heart, namely prayer.

For this year,
• I hope that I could surrender and be more of a conduit, more of a light.
• I hope to be a light that shines because my inner light is glowing.
• I hope my light will be radiant during prayer as my relationship with Hashem deepens.
• I hope to be a light that knows when to say no. Sometimes a no now is a yes to something greater.
• I hope that this year the world sees no more covid and next year on Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur we can max out the capacity of the Haven for Harford, the new "Harford Chabad Center for Jewish Life".

 

Wishing you to be signed and sealed for a blesses year

 Rabbi Kushi Schusterman

P.S. See the Yom Kippur Schedule Below 

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